I found this picture tonight and it brought tears to my eyes.



Daisy has been gone for two years now and I miss this little pup still.

And then I found this one.  And my heart melted again.



Bennie, my first dog love.  I was smitten for this puppy too.

Apparently I should quit looking at old pictures when I blog. 

And then there is this one.  The cheese stands alone.



I can't say I have ever been smitten with Bogey, but I have learned to love her dearly over the years.  She has been with us through our marriage, four homes, three babies and two puppies.  She is a loyal dog, who is wonderful with the girls.  And although I complain daily about her hair, which blankets the house like a thick snow, she has found a special place in my heart. 

Just don't tell Chris.  I like him to think that I don't like her.  We secretly snuggle when he is not home.

Chris and I have been wanting to paint downstairs for quite some time.  We've been so busy having babies, taking care of babies, and thinking about babies, that it just hasn't gotten done.  Until this weekend.  We started talking about it and suddenly we were buying paint and putting the kids to bed.  We powered through Saturday evening until the wee hours putting primer on the walls of the kitchen.  And then on Sunday we were able to get both coats of "copper glow" onto the walls.  I wanted something very warm in our kitchen and I am very happy with the color.  I feel like I am walking into a bistro.  Here are some before and after shots.

       
I got the idea for these square pictures from The Thrifty Decor Chick. 
They are made from canvas and scrapbook paper.  I love them.


     
These are not the best pictures because there is so much junk in the kitchen in both of the pictures. 
Please excuse my mess.


Just a fun picture to see the color.  Isn't it stunning?


And I found this great rug.  It was more than I wanted to spend,
but I think I am going to have to keep it.

I have been meaning to update the blog for some time.  But my heart and my head couldn't find the words.  And so I will try to impart what I can, knowing that words may fail me.

It all started about six months ago, during my morning quiet time in prayer.  I had such a restlessness deep within that I couldn't describe it.  I talked to Chris about it, but all I knew was that something was moving in me.  I knew that I was to start praying for something but I didn't know what. 

About a month later, I was having coffee with a friend and I shared with her that I had something on my heart but that God still had not revealed what it was.  As she gently pressed me on, we started talking about children.  We realized that for the last six years of my life, every 18-months or so I have either gotten pregnant or started trying to have another baby.  Olivia was 18 months old.  She threw out the idea that perhaps I was simply mourning the fact that I can no longer have any more children.  With tears in my eyes, I knew that this was part of what was stirring inside of me. 

As I continued to search God's word and listen to his voice in prayer, I was drawn to the story of Abraham.  When God spoke to Abraham his reply was always "Yes, Lord."  Even when God was asking Abraham to take extreme risks, his reply was always "Yes, Lord."  I knew that whatever was heading my way, I was to respond with a "Yes, Lord" and leave all the worrying and "what-ifs" out of the situation.  As many of you know, I am an expert worrier and have a PhD in "what-ifs."

Last Wednesday I woke up in the middle of the night, restless and anxious.  I checked on all the kids, wondering what had woken me up.  I decided to check my email and when I did tears flooded my pillow.  I had just received an email that there would be children from Haiti arriving in Indianapolis that needed homes.  They were asking for families to consider taking in children (notice I did not say child).  I spent the rest of the morning praying that God would speak to Chris, giving us both direction.  Chris and I had recently talked about foster care and/or adoption and Chris was adamant that it was not the right time - Olivia was too young, we don't have the money, he is in school and often not home or busy with school work, etc.  But when God calls you to something, you take a step of faith.  No what-ifs.  And so, we called the organization who sent out the email and said we could take one or two children into our homes. 



I cannot describe the joy in my heart.... and the overwhelming anxiousness that seeped into my heart later.  Our family might be growing within a matter of days.  What were we doing?  How would this work out?  Where would they sleep?  How would we communicate with them?  What?  What?  What?

As emails and updates started flowing in over the next couple of days we soon realized that the organization was given some incorrect information and they were only lining up potential families "in case" this was to happen.  The disappointment penetrated my entire body.  There were no orphans coming and there might never be.  So why did God call us to this?  I am still not sure, other than we are still hoping that this opportunity will become real, that God would place a precious child(ren) in such dire need into our loving arms. 

Report after report continues to say that unless the state department would loosen their restrictions, these orphans simply cannot just be put on a plane and shipped overseas.  There are visa regulations and adoption laws that take precedent.  And UNICEF is working hard to make sure that these children do not leave the country yet.  With such chaos, some of the children thought to be orphans, may in fact have living family members.  Some children not thought to be orphans may soon be due to disease, starvation and dehydration.  I pray that as Haiti tries to recover from this horrible disaster, that the children will be protected, loved and nourished.  And in the meantime.... God has our arms and hearts wide open.

This past weekend Avery had her debut as a cheerleader.  Yes, I am her mom.  And yes, I am her coach.  But seriously, this girl is good.  See for yourself.



Ok, now that you have confirmed her natural talent, let me tell you a bit about the cheer program she is in.  She is part of Upward, a Christian-based sports program.  We have devotionals, prayers and memory verses at EVERY practice and game.  The girls are rewarded after each game with special stickers that relate to their effort and Christ-likeness.  What a wonderful way to learn a sport!  Avery is really enjoying learning to cheer.  And since I am the coach and our practices are on a night Chris is in school, Mia and Olivia are enjoying learning all about cheering too  Brings back some memories for this 'ole cheerleader.  I will say that I kindly declined from showing the girls a toe-touch.

Yes, I know I am two weeks late posting a blog about Christmas.  I could blame it on the busyness of the holidays, but it would be a big, fat lie.  This year the holidays were just ... different.  I have been trying to think about how to describe it and I can't seem to put it into words.  Maybe we adults have finally grasped how to have Christmas with children in our midst again.  Maybe the children are getting old enough to handle the boring adult stuff.  I don't know, but the holidays were wonderful, with very little stress.  I feel blessed that the holidays are always a wonderful time, but it just didn't seem so crazy this year. 

I won't get into all the details, but I would like to comment on a few of my favorite things.

• This year we did an Advent candle and read verses from the New Testament every night at dinner.  It was a wonderful way to get the girls into the Word and prepare our hearts for Christmas.  We fought each night about who got to blow the candle out.  The whole "peace on Earth" thing didn't sink in.
• I love to bake.  The girls love to bake.  This resulted in baking lots of cookies, often several times a week.  That's how we roll.  I put on 50 lbs.
• Chris was able to have time off of work, AND he was off of school.  It was like we won the lottery!  We spent lots of time loving on Chris!
• Although Livie was in the hospital on the 23rd due to extreme dehydration from Rota Virus, God blessed us with a speedy recovery and an uneventful Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  On Sunday, Chris fell ill.  Wait a minute, didn't I say it wasn't stressful this year?  Ok, this part may be the exception.
• Christmas morning was a blast.  The girls' excitement and thankful hearts were awesome.  Santa brought each of the girls a special gift.  Yes, our girls believe in Santa and yes, we are ok with that.
• We were able to spend Christmas Eve with the Troxel family, and Christmas Day with the Kammeyer family.  Both were wonderful times of extreme food consumption, lively chatter and Christmas spirit.

For many of you Christmas has already been removed from your mind, and you are chugging into the New Year at full speed.  For me this year, I have chosen to dwell on Christmas just a little bit longer.  Sometimes things are just so wonderful that you have to.

Today we had our first "playable" snow, and since the girls are out of school on Christmas break it was the perfect morning to bundle up and head outside.  Olivia didn't last long, but she hasn't been feeling well so she wasn't her normal curious self today.


"What is this stuff, Mama?"


Avery really wanted to build a snowman....


... a little flat but he will do.  (The snow was not cooperating!)


Yeah!!! Snow!!!!


Silly Snow Angel!

This year for Avery's birthday, she really wanted to have a slumber party.  I thought the girls were a little young but decided to give it a try.  We ended up having six girls spend the night, including Avery and Mia.  We decided to have family and friends over for pizza and cake prior to the slumber party.  It was such a fun celebration this year.  The girls made it well past midnight - I couldn't believe it!  We were all tired the next day....


Making this cake was so much fun.  The girls "ate" it up


Opening presents surrounded by friends.


Avery applying makeup to her friend Cady. 
After everyone had their makeup done, they did a Makeup Fashion Show for everyone. 
It was so cute!


Time to do each other's hair.  Everyone wanted braided pigtails.


Manicures and pedicures. 


Twister!!!  The girls loved this game and played this quite a bit that night.


Jenga was also a hit.


What's a slumber party without a pillow fight!?!


Mia and her buddy Sierra snuggled in for the night.


The whole crew.  (And yes, I recruited another mom to stay the night with me!)


Chris made the girls his Famous French Toast on the grill in the morning. 
(Avery was totally embarrassed by his hat, which is exactly why he wore it!).


French Toast with a whole lot of makeup on!

Happy Birthday, Sweet Avery!  You are growing up so fast!!!

On Saturday we celebrated our annual Troxel Christmas Fancy Dinner with the girls.  We started this tradition on accident (like most good traditions) three years ago  when we decided to head downtown so that Avery could see the lights on the Circle.  We got dressed up and decided to go out to dinner beforehand.  We had such a wonderful time, that we do it every year now. 

The girls were so excited to get all dressed up for our special night.  I even let them wear a little make-up and some perfume.  It was so fun getting ready together.  They looked so pretty! 

We headed out to The Old Spaghetti Factory for dinner.  It was a huge hit with everyone.  Then we headed toward the Circle to see the lights.  This year Chris and I had a little surprise up our sleeves for the girls.  We had rented a horse-drawn carriage to give us a ride through downtown.  The girls were so excited and loved every minute of it.  It was a little cold, but we snuggled under blankets and enjoyed the beautiful lights.  We ended our evening at Starbucks with warm drinks for everyone.

This tradition has become one of my most favorite things about the holidays.  I get excited about where we are going to go and what we are going to wear.  It's so fun to get all dressed up and create such special memories with our girls. 


Everyone is ready to eat!


Cheese!


This is really good, Mommy!


Rosy cheeks for Olivia.


Carriage ride snuggles.


Olivia loved watching the scenery.


Troxel Christmas Fancy Dinner 2009.


Cuteness.

The girls love Thanksgiving for two reasons:  homemade noodles and the green light on starting Christmas fun!  We got our tree on "Black Friday" and put it up that night.  (And it's a good thing we did because Chris was sick the rest of the weekend!)  The girls and I made our first batch of Christmas cookies while Chris got the tree inside and up in our tree stand.  I wanted us to have some sort of "fun" dinner before decorating the tree, so we did cheese fondue.  It was a huge hit!  Here is a start to the festivities around our house....


We started off the season by getting Christmas Build-A-Bears. 
The girls used their own money to purchase these fun, new additions to our family.
Avery's named hers Holiday (Holly) Moose, while Mia named hers Molly Christmas.

   
During our first Christmas trip to the mall, Livie found some new things to climb on,
while Mia spent time reading to her new friend, Molly Christmas.


That is one crazy Christmas baby.  She has already broke four ornaments!


Chris is helping Mia get the Santa on the top of the tree. 


Avery loves hanging all the ornaments on the tree.

This year Avery really wanted to try to string cranberries and popcorn after seeing it on a movie made by the American Girl Doll company.  It ended up being a fun project for both Avery and Mia.  The popcorn was a little tricky, and I later learned you are supposed to use stale popcorn (ours was still warm from me popping it!), but the girls really got into this, especially Avery.  This is definitely something we will do again.


My little crafter.


Mia got a little bored after awhile, so she entertained us with her cranberry mustache.


Ta-da!!

One of the things I loved about this project was how much of Avery and Mia's personality came out while doing this.  Avery was all about making it perfect, coming up with a pattern and completing her project.  She wanted to find a prominent place to display her cranberry string when she was done.  Mia, on the other hand, strung some cranberries, ate a lot of popcorn and then asked why we didn't just use marshmallows instead of popcorn.  Leave it to my little inventor to come up with a solution to our problem without really even caring about the problem.  She entertained herself with creative cranberry sculptures, giggling to herself.  God has blessed both of them with such amazing gifts!

With Thanksgiving tomorrow, and the chaos of Christmas on our heels (and in our faces in most places), I wanted to take the time to search my heart for true thanksgiving.  God has blessed me in so many ways that I cannot comprehend them all.  I pray that He will continue to open my eyes His goodness.

Here are just a few of God's rich blessings:

• An amazing husband, who listens with both ears, provides abundantly, wrestles with the girls, and loves me unconditionally.
• Three amazing daughters, who teach me patience, love and faith.  
• Beautiful friends who laugh with me, share life with me and remind me that God has made all of me, imperfect as I am.
• God's patience.  I need a lot of it.  Sigh.
• My beautiful family.  As I get older I realize more and more that it isn't about having a picture-perfect family, it's about loving them anyway  Each of my family members teach me different things about life, and I cherish each one of them for their uniqueness. 
• For the worldly possessions God has given us - a warm home, food on our table and cars that enable us to travel.  We live in the richest country in the world, and I don't want to take these things for granted for a minute.  God has placed us in this city, in this time for a reason.  I pray we will share our wealth with those around us.

Happy Thanksgiving!!  May your bellies be full, and your hearts comforted. 

And for those that has jumped the gun on Christmas decorating, may your lights explode and fall to the ground.  Ok, just kidding.